By Stephanie Mesler (aka Freda Frostbite)
Created At A Fiction To Go Workshop,6/14/2016
He'd just fucking walked across the water and all those sons of bitches could think of was asking him to do it again. C'mon Jess, one more time! If you did it once, you can do it again! Mikey missed the whole thing-- he was out gettin' beer for all your new pals. Do it again so he can see!
Jess couldn't even bring himself to look at his friends. What a bunch of colossal assholes they were. The smartest of 'em was too dumb to come in outa the rain. Had they any idea how exhausted he was from being their personal circus act? First it was, Hey, jess, can you brew up some more fire water in that still of yours? Then it was, Yo, Jessie man, what're we gonna eat tonight? and where can we find some women, man? Can ya conjure us up some of those pros we saw downtown? While you're at it, make 'em hot enough they won't care what we smell like.
I don't smell, shouted one of 'em to the others.
Yeah, ya do, said another.
Then they started tossin’ each other into the water while Jess stood back and watched.
Fools, he thought to himself wishing he'd never agreed to spend spring break with this crew of idiots from Kappa Delta Dipshit.
He'd gotten into a boat to get away from their constant blathering, but they'd all followed him aboard and he'd ended up trapped in a 12-foot skiff with 13 of the stinkinest asswhipes to ever come outa any woman's womb. Jesus Christ, couldn't they let him have 10 minutes to himself? Ten minutes when he dudn't have to listen to all their damned yammering. He'd gotten so fed up he stepped off the deck of the boat and suited up with the water jet. Jess had never used one before but he'd seen it done. He cranked that sucker up and headed... well, truthfully, he hadn't known where he was headed. He just wanted outa the boat and away from those jabbering jackasses. It took every bit of strength and energy he could muster to stay aloft, above a stream of water aimed pretty much up his ass. Somehow he'd managed to keep atop the thing and not drown himself in the Banana River. He'd ridden that spout of water toward shore where he jumped off and collapsed in an exhausted heap in the sand.
He enjoyed a few minutes of quiet -- he'd hoped for more -- before his "friends" managed to stop rowing against each other and floated ashore right next to him. Jess didn't even look up as they whooped and hollered about his daring feat of balance in motion. He laid down at the edge of the water and started to cover himself with wet sand. He didn't plan to bury himself alive but he'd take whatever quiet he could get. He closed his eyes and waited for the tide to come in.
Spring Break is © 2016 Stephanie Mesler